


A Top of the Head Kiss

by AvidReaderOfAll



Series: A Collection of Kisses [5]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: 10 Years after Origins, ALL THE ANGST, Angst, During Inquisition, Established Relationship, F/M, Mild Suicidal Thoughts, POV Warden, Some of the comfort, Warden can be read as any female
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:48:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29419638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvidReaderOfAll/pseuds/AvidReaderOfAll
Summary: The Calling is always closer than you think it is.
Relationships: Female Aeducan/Zevran Arainai, Female Amell/Zevran Arainai, Zevran Arainai/Female Brosca, Zevran Arainai/Female Cousland, Zevran Arainai/Female Mahariel, Zevran Arainai/Female Surana, Zevran Arainai/Female Tabris, Zevran Arainai/Female Warden, Zevran Arainai/Warden
Series: A Collection of Kisses [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1917481
Kudos: 13





	A Top of the Head Kiss

“Nightmares again, _mi amor_?” Zevran sat up from their cramped bedroll and brushed his hands against her arm, pulling her towards him.

She doesn’t want to move her hands from her face, she doesn’t want him to look at her. She hasn’t for a while now. It’s not fair to him, she knows that; he loves her still, even after the past decade of utterly exhausting years. But now… Now, with what she can only assume is the Archdemon catching up to her, she wants to shield him from the worst of it. She doesn’t want him to see her fade. The horrible dreams she had during the Blight don't compare to these new ones. Her hair is thinning, falling out in clumps if she dares to brush it. She can feel her left eye beginning to cloud over; the mirror doesn’t show that yet but it’s only a matter of time. Her cheeks are sallow and nearly sunken at this point. She is thankful for the near-complete darkness that their small tent provides.

She feels like a different person. No longer the woman he fell in love with.

She knows that she should have years left before the taint takes her. Duncan and Riordan were both Grey Wardens for longer than she has been and had not shown any symptoms. But she knows what this is: the beginning of the end. The Archdemon may not have killed her outright, but it’s coming for its pound of flesh. Its soul passed through her, not consuming her like it wanted, instead further tainting her. She had felt the immensity of it consume her, break her, rebuild her. She came out the other side unconscious and victorious. _But at what cost?_ Alistair and Morrigan’s suffering had saved her. Then.

Now, she’s dying. She knows she is. She can search for a “cure” all she wants, she can wish and believe with all her might but she knows the truth. No cure can save her now.

Her hair will fall out, her eyes will sink in her skull, her skin will pull taunt in places and grow loose in others. She will become a ghoul, destined to wander aimlessly in the Deep Roads until a darkspawn kills her. _Or she kills herself first._

She wonders how Ruck is doing. If she will see him down there. If he’s even somehow still alive all these years later.

Zevran pulls on her arm again. Calls her name. Not for the first time by his worried tone.

“Just the usual nightmares, Zev.” She contorts her face into a smile. “Go back to sleep, I’ll be fine.” His hand slides down her arm, grasping her hand in his. She can’t help herself as she leans forward to meet him, his other hand sliding around her neck, as he touches their foreheads together. She closes her eyes and wraps her remaining hand - _weak, nearly skeletal_ \- around his arm.

“I love you,” he whispers between them, not as a secret but as a reassurance meant only for her ears. _And I, you. I love you so much Zevran you don’t even know._ She thinks that she can see the beginning of tears in his eyes as they separate. He goes to lay back down, the hand on her neck guiding her down as well.

She allows herself to be moved around until she is wrapped in his arms, her head on his chest. She rests her hand above his heart - _beating strongly, a solid rhythm much unlike her own_ \- and closes her eyes. She will not sleep again tonight, but she will pretend to. She lets out a deep sigh and feels his arms tighten around her. He presses a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

“Go to sleep, _mi amor_ , I am here.” If only she could. She tries to block out the noise in her head with the sound of his beating heart. She wishes she could speak to it. For every time it beats she wishes she could tell him that she loves him. Who will tell him that when she is gone?

She presses her cheek against his chest and whispers, _I love you, I love you, I love you._


End file.
